Sunday, April 05, 2009

The Power To Choose, Part One


The sun shines into the room as it slowly begins to set over the small hill behind the hospital, dotted with cottages and church steeples. I squint in the dusky light as Komrad Konsultant Kardiologist, my latest boss, flips open my end-of-term assessment form and sits down at his table.

"So, Angry...let's see." He begins.

I brace myself. Here come the hard questions about why I wasn't at ward rounds, why his patients have no idea who I am, and that one time I fell asleep in a patient's bed...

But Komrad Konsultant stops flipping the file, and looks out the window. "I think you've done quite well, Angry. I think you'll go far, in fact."

I blink. Me, going far? ME? Has he got the wrong file? What has he been smoking?

Komrad Konsultant adjusts his glasses as the sun glints off them. "You see...all this work you do now may sometimes seem pointless. All the slogging, all the early mornings, all the nasty doctors ordering you around..." He closes the file.

"What you have to remember is that you're storing choice for the future." Now he looks at me directly. "The really successful people in life, Angry, they reach a level where they can choose where they want to go. Which hospital, which specialty, which job. They write their own tickets. Everybody else, they have to hope and pray. But if you're REALLY good...you get to choose."

He signs the assessment form, ticks the 'EXCELLENT' box and hands it to me. "I think you're one of those who'll get to choose."

I sit for a while, just staring at him, stunned. Then I walk out of his room in a bit of a daze.

I don't think I deserved such high praise. Not at all. I haven't been focusing my energies where I should be lately. And to some extent I've betrayed my dream of clinical medicine, after moaning and ranting about it for three years in Cambridge. And I've made a few big mistakes. But hopefully it's not too late to correct them.

And it's not just me Komrad Konsultant was talking about. We all deserve the power to choose. So here's to working harder. Here's to storing up choice for the future. Thanks, Dr B.

31 comments:

Anonymous said...

haha see see? u'll make it! won't say i told u so :)

zoo

rlbates said...

Good for you!

Vanilla Pod said...

Ah, I am so happy that things are looking up. Must be really tough in Medic Military *cough* school.
Keep yer chin up.

Anonymous said...

well done Angry, hopefully this means you'll have more time for blogging....

aprilmay said...

to angry: after a full afternoon, i have finally finished read EVERY SINGLE ONE of your posts. which is pretty sad, i admit. (sadder still that i'm actually meant to be revising for exams.) anyway, i'm not exactly of uni age yet, but i just wanted to say that you inspire me even more to pursue medicine. which is pretty frightening, imho. but yeah, you do. you really really do.

uhhh, pretty long-ish comment. but at least i got the point across ? ..and well done btw ! c:

Dan said...

i would have taken the blue pill and shoved the red pill up his ass.

anyway.

angry medic, i am visiting you in london this weekend. get ready the red carpet and don't forget the protocols.

Sheena said...

Just to say, I'm glad you had this. Medical school only gets crappier from here on in. And your self-esteem along with it. So, it's always good to have ONE moment you can look back on & say, "SOMEONE was convinced I'd make it."

Take it, even if you think he's been smokin' a little somethin'. Some people don't even get that much.

"God grant me the vision to see my choices, the courage to choose, and the wisdom to make the right choice, for life is a series of choices that is going to lead us someplace."

- My 'Choice' Prayer, inspired by the Serenity Prayer (duh!) and a similar-type note written by a friend.

P/S - Nicely-written, this post :)

Sheena said...

PP/S - (And I'm shamelessly pimping here :) I've changed my blog url to sheenapunya.wordpress.com

Catch you 'round.

Aki said...

Your posts have gotten so much more serious recently =)

Dan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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Ms-Ellisa said...

Congratulations Angry :-D

That sounds like a very inspiring teacher.

It's nice when they make you want to work harder.

It's awful when someone makes you wish you didn't have to wake up in the morning and go to the hospital... again.

:)

Dr. Deb said...

Some of the most modest people do some of the most wonderful work. It's those that THINK they are superfantastic that often fail to deliver.

Congrats, Angry.

Dan said...

i would also appreciate it kindly if you kindly visited my house for dinner at some point today.

XE said...

That's great news. I hope that'll give you the motivation you need to work hard and fulfill this consulant's predictions.

James said...

To control the pain we must attend to the specialist because we can give him what is appropriate and what we need, for example I take hydrocodone, vicodin which is medicine used to counter the chronic pain that I have for years, but I rioja prescribing doctor, I take it in moderation because I read in findrxonline.com which is a medicine that causes anxiety, and we must control it as it can affect your nervous system, so do not take medicines without consultation because it really can be dangerous.

Dan said...

the dude above me just spouted a lot of words i don't understand...

instead, here is a link to an article on medicine http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Medicine

Jade said...

Well done Angry. Im with Sheena, unfortunately it only gets crappier.
By the way, the are a bunch of exchange students/doctors here and they all seem to dress the same. Always khaki with pale blue shirts, dyu guys have like a hectic dress code?

The Underappreciated Medical Student said...

Wonderful! Well done. Everything seems to have a slightly more serious tinge to it on here at the moment. Eek.

Physician disability insurance said...

Your Komrad was correct, being a successful person does open quite a few doors for an individual. Interesting article.

Ask the doctor said...

This is really a well laid out website. I like how you have presented the information in full detail. Keep up the great work and please stop by my site sometime. The url is http://healthy-nutrition-facts.blogspot.com

Dan said...

yes i agree. this is a very well laid out website.

tracy said...

Yay, Angry, congrats, my little winner! Soooo very happy for you!

love,
momma tracy

AzRN said...

unlurking to say good job! the komrade sees your talent and potential.

Socrates said...

Angry,

next time your boss tries to give you a hand shandy, tell him to fuck off and just carry on...

humility is all, as mrs heathcote-harvey's haemorrhoids are about to prove

Socrates said...

ps, hi dan,

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Arvinder said...

It is nice to have options- trust me, I think you know. But at the end of the day, whatever said and done, everyone gets slaughtered- good or bad. People (and I mean Drs) tend to forget they were once at the tail of the line and forgot how it felt to get the jacking. All I can say is- you must always work hard and reach your targets but remember that in every road/highway/even the Autobharn- there are bound to be a few bumps

Anonymous said...

Hang on a sec, wasn't Morpheus only holding one red coloured pill?

The Angry Medic said...

Dr Arvinder: Truer words were never spoken bro. Very wise insights.

Prickly Anonymous: What? What're you talking about man?? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING TO SAVE LIVES HERE?! *E.R. theme plays

LOL me, saving lives? Ahaha. Come to think of it, I never noticed that in the picture. No idea but I swear that wasn't me doing some stupid Photoshopping. (not this time at least)