Friday, April 20, 2007

Anistreplase THIS

Voice In My Head (That Sounds Suspiciously Like My Pharmacology Supervisor): Okay, dumbass, what's anistreplase?

Me: Pfft that's easy. Thrombolytic drug.

Voice In My Head: And what does it DO?

Me: Uhm...prevents blood from clotting.

Voice In My Head: And what is it made of?

Me: That's ridiculous. That's not gonna be on the exam!

Voice In My Head: Oh yes it is.

Me: No it's not.

Voice In My Head: Yes it IS, dumbass. Look at last year's paper, Subsection 2 Question 53a.*

Me: WHAT? They can't ask THAT! That's obscure to the point of being retarded!

Voice In My Head: YOU'RE the retard, retard. No coffee break for you. Now what's anistreplase made of?


This is nuts, you know.

*question number changed for privacy. Exam papers have feelings too.

21 comments:

The Angry Medic said...

P.S. Is that last picture a bit tasteless? A friend recommended it to me. If it's tasteless tell me and I'll remove it.

P.P.S. Dan, don't use this as an opportunity to flame me.

Anonymous said...

Come on Angry. Even dumbass medics at remedial medical schools need to learn more about a drug than what it does.

Anonymous Too said...

O RLY?

Maggie said...

Love the last picture, am sitting here grinning still.

Good luck with all the revision!

Kenny Mah said...

Even exam papers have feelings too you know --- hee. I like that. I bet they do, the heartless, difficult bastards. ;)

And hey, is your mailbox clogged up or something? My email keeps getting bounced back. So here's the easy route for you to email me: mine's [my name] [at] gmail [dot] com

I'm paranoid but with damn good reason...

Still curious what you're gonna email me lah...

Anonymous said...

Well, maybe the mum of the boy wouldn't be too pleased.
But we understand, coz you're under great pharmacological pressure.
Er, would you like me to help pound some white stuff for your practical? Oh, theory only, is it? Okay...

Sweating Writer

medstudentitis said...

Man. If that crap was on my exams I surely wouldn't be the 1/2 doctor I am today.

Good luck with that though.

Cal said...

Hahah, Angry, you do crack me up at times! That image is hilarious!

And to Kenny, above:
I wouldn't hold your breath.... Angry has a habit of promising to send emails out, then failing to deliver...

;)

Dr Michelle Tempest said...

Not sure about the picture.
Exams... exams... more exams... don't forget to enjoy the sunshine as well! Michelle

Dr. Deb said...

You have such wit!!

the little medic said...

haha!!!
I had a dream the other night about a similar experience. For some reason I was made to sit an OSCE station again but the questions were all ridiculously detailed and I didn't know any of them. Then the bell went for the end of the station and I saw the easy questions at the end that we hadn't had time to get to.
It was a VERY traumatic experience.

Anonymous said...

Hi Angry Medic,

RE your post on "Becoming a Doctor" and "First Night on Call" teaching"...oh, how I wish you had been around when I was going through a really baaaaad, rough time in my life that ended up
"requiring" numerous stiches and staples. I keep thinking to myself, "Well, if there had been a medical student or resident to do the job, who maybe could have learned something and wanted to do it, at least something good could have come of it." Instead I got t r u l y angry medics who were just pissed off at what I had done to myself....not that I blame them. Oh well, thank you for letting me ramble...and thank you for the VT symbol.

Love you, love your blog, love your eyelashes, anon

Bohemian Road Nurse... said...

Hmmmm.....anistreplase....

If I was taking an exam and wasn't allowed to look it up, I'd probably make a smart-aleck answer like: "anise flavoring and streptokinase".

I once had an anatomy exam on which I couldn't remember the word "manubrium". I thought and thuoght. I knew the word started with the letter 'm' but I cuoldn't think of the rest...and so I finally thought: "Think like a doctor!"

And so I wrote a legible first letter 'm'----and scribbed the rest of the word in what I call "illegible doctor script".

On my paper, the instructor marked it "incorrect"---along with the comment: "Nice try..."

(As for my smart-aleck streak when not knowing an answer, another time I was asked what the med Aciphex was and I replied: "Is it an insecticide that kills aphids in your flower garden?"....)

(Admit it, Aciphex sounds like an insecticide that kills aphids...)

Esme said...

Oh dear.

And I thought that ambigous AS-biology questions on fish ventilation was bad enough...

I can work out the physiology, I just don't bloody care what all the little structure things are called. It's a fish for god's sake!

Going through past paper's depressing/retarded.

Emirin M K said...

Angry Medic strikes again, lol... and you still play SW: Empire at War?

zewt said...

i think i need to re-consider whether i should go see you for free consultation when you're a full doc... :P

thank God I dont get voices in my mind asking me who invented balance sheet when i took my exams.

adam said...

Hey AM, bravo on getting the guts to put up your picture online!

The Angry Medic said...

Adam: Oh har har, you're funny, aren't you? :) Yeah I decided to put up that pic we took when we met up at Retards Anonymous. Forgot to ask you if you minded though,mate, your face is visible next to mine.

adam said...

LOL AM, you slay me. Yeah I was a little disappointed that you didn't do a close up of me... maybe it was best that you didn't - I was foaming at the mouth the whole time. sigh.

Anonymous said...

this photo is tasteless and you should remove it. I hardly think it is appropriate for you to use this man in a rude and ignorant manner! Grow up, and I hope I never have to see you for any kind of medical care.

Anonymous said...

I don't think the picture was his. it has one of those mass-market image generator website addresses at the bottom. it's prolly been used in tons of other websites.